Nothing

What's wrong with me?
I have a good life,
Someone who truly loves me for me,
A nice home,
And money to spend on whatever I wish.

I have so much more than a lot of people,
But Something is still wrong.
My brain is defective.
It's slow,
It's broken.
I'm in a life that should make me happy,
But I still feel the heavy weight of sadness.

I still push people away from me.
I still wish to stay in my dreams instead of reality.
I still crave to see the blood that flows through my veins,
The one substance that keeps me alive,
To taste the sweet metallic life in me.

I don't feel like I should be alive,
Sometimes I don't want to be.
I have nothing to contribute to this world...
I'm still useless...
I have nothing to fight for,
Nothing to strive for,
I am still Nothing.